If you are newly married or about to get married, then, the following is a must for you. Next time, when you get an opportunity to stay with an elderly and successfully married couple, observe them closely. Here, the term successfully refers to the happiness the couple get from each other. You will easily find that they have carefully built the success of their marriage, on five important elements known as selflessness, commitment, friendship, laughs and fun in marriage and support at good Times
The meaning of selflessness is very simple. It is just an art of pleasing your spouse and make her/him happy. Spouses, with such determination, will always put in 110% of their efforts, to satisfy their partner. But, such efforts should come from the heart, with a firm commitment to put the happiness of your spouse, before yours. This selflessness, should come without any preconceived notion or condition and it should come spontaneously, without the need of any extra effort. The selflessness, has always blended with a maturity, to fulfill the comfort of your spouse and magnanimity to eschew, failures from your partner.
It is a fact that the term commitment is not fully understood by many from the marital point of view. In simple terms, commitment is a decisiveness of both the spouses, to continue the marriage despite all the odds. Spouses really committed to each other, will have all the three types of commitments such as personal, principled and a structural. One must remember that commitment to spouse, is not a one time affair and it is a lifetime matter. The spouses should convey this commitment, through vibrant actions instead of a passive silence.
Friendship in Marriage
Social science researchers have found that nurturing friendship by the spouses makes the marriage a success. The basis of friendship, starts with a thorough understanding of the likes and dislikes of the other. The real friendship in a marriage, appreciates the positive performances of the partner, while evaluating the negative aspects, for positive correction. Such a friendship, allows the spouses to realize, respect and honor the doings of the other. The spouses in friendship, will always enjoy and relish whatever the little things they do every day, nurture and relish such little acts and will carefully take it to the next level.
Laughs and Fun in Marriage
Most of the couples, considers marriage as a very serious business and become busy with the errands of marriage.The first victim of such seriousness, is fun and laughs. They get drowned with errands such as working, housekeeping, finance managing and will hardly have time for sleep. The couple becomes more active with the birth of children. The laugh and fun, slowly get disappeared from their marriage relationship, without their real knowledge. The spouses should become aware of this missing element and allocate time for laughs and fun to sustain their marriage.
Support at Good Times
One may find it odd to discover that support at good times, sustains a marriage. Most of us are aware of the support extended by the spouse, at the time of struggle and it comes handy to win over a problem. Support at good times, is altogether a different component. It is the support and participation given by one partner to the success of the other. Such support to the partner, starts with asking questions, clearing doubts about a project or attempt, giving encouragement, complimenting on every success and finally celebrating the success of achievement. The spouses should learn to support and celebrate the success of their partner. While the support at bad times holds the family intact and assists in the growth of family, the support at good times sustains the love between the partners and keeps their marriage intact.